Dean and Anna’s wedding
Best Man Speech
5Th May 2013
DERBY DAY!!!
Welcome to the wedding today
It’s great to see you all I must say
I’m the best man the best that Dean could do
I have a few words I’d like to share with you
So please give me a little of your time
While I bring to you my speech in rhyme
When I was told I had to do this speech I felt a little nervous and sick
To put it quite bluntly I was shitting a brick
It looks like Dean has roped me in then
Only because he got turned down by Simon and Glen
Glen sadly can’t be here today
He’s with son Finley miles away
Simon is teaching English in Mexico
Sleeping with the students we all know
So you’re stuck with me and I really must say
Who booked a wedding on DERBY DAY!!!
Dean we know Anna’s a fantastic catch
But agreeing to marry her on the day of the match
It does not make sense do you know what you’ve done
It looks like you’re already under the thumb!!!
I grew up with Dean as a mate he is sound
Mosspitts Lane was our old stomping ground
I picked up Dean’s humour along the way
So if my jokes are not funny its Dean’s fault today
Dean and Anna as friends you are great
But time keeping’s not your strength and are both often late
As we know you’re both so badly organised
When you’re late on nights out it’s no big surprise
Now I’d like to say a few things about Dean
But I have had instructions to keep it clean
Anna’s given me the rules on a list
Rule number one don’t get too pissed
Don’t bring up religion or go on too long
No dirty jokes and no Everton songs
And for her last rule I really don’t care
Can you believe it don’t F—king swear!!!
It is Anna’s wedding day so I would be a fool
If I didn’t take note and follow these rules
Seriously Anna can I just say
You look absolutely fantastic today
Dean’s a lucky man and must be filled with pride
To make his vows today to such a beautiful bride
When I look back to Vegas it brings back a smile
You looked so stunning as you walked down the aisle
Back to Dean now so how did we meet
Back in the 90s he moved into our Street
He arrived from Canada with a smile so wide
And a haircut as big as the trees there outside
The new kid on the block we thought he was great
And everyone in the playground wanted to be his best mate
We’d talk about Canada and the Toronto Maple Leafs
What he’d done back home and the sweets that he’d eat
He lived two doors away from me so we’d walk home from school
Arguing a lot and acting the fool
One minute we’d be fighting each other and taking the piss
But we’d soon make up and give each other a kiss
Male bonding of course there was no bromance
But we have been known to share the odd dance
Even though you only asked me two weeks ago
I’m proud to be your best man and wanted you to know
I may have been third choice but I think it is great
And I’m honoured to do this for my best mate
So to the bridesmaid what can I say
Carina you look fantastic today
The best man and the bridesmaid are supposed to share some romance!!
But Sadie and Chris are watching so we’ll just share a dance
Dean and Anna you’ve been together 11 years
You’ve shared lots of joy and the odd tear
To those that know you as well as Sadie and me
You devotion to each other is clear to see
It’s good for the soul to see you together
A match made in heaven that will last forever
5th May 2013 will always be a special day in your life
The day you made your vows and become husband and wife
Before this speech comes to an end
Can I make a toast to absent friends?
Two people missing who were always full of fun
The life and soul of any party Patrick and John
Sadly missed and we send them our love
I’m sure they’ll be raising a glass up above!!
Back to today and what we are here for
The match of course what was the score
The reds they got lucky and managed a draw
We’re still above them though the match was a bore
Can everyone now be up standing in the room
As I make a toast to the bride and groom
To a future so bright to a future so happy
To a future with children and plenty of nappies
Soul mates forever soul mates for life
Dean and Anna HUSBAND AN WIFE!!!
For Dean and Anna let’s have a big cheer
That’s my speech over let’s get on with the beer!!!
A John Deane production in conjunction with Johnny Lewis
www.lost4wordsuk.co.uk – Copyright reserved May 2013
